Body & Soul
In the film Five Easy Pieces starring Jack Nicholson, the main character played by him, works in an oil field for many years after failing to achieve the dream of being a pianist; a dream
which his parents created for him. Throughout the film, Jack’s character Robert Dupea doesn’t really know what he’s supposed to do with his life. He keeps running from his fears, his family, and from his past.
Figuring out what you were put on this Earth to do can sometimes be like putting together a jigsaw puzzle when the pieces are spread around the world. Some people don’t complete their puzzle because they often don’t have the patience, desire, or they’re just fearful. However, the five pieces needed to complete the puzzle of your life’s purpose are actually quite easy to find.
Here are the five easy pieces to piecing together your purpose in life.
1. Recognizing your talents and passions
This is probably the easiest and most common way for people to discover their purpose in life. So we’ll start off with it.
Following you talents and passions will lead to fulfillment, happiness, and even money to pay the bills (or even a lot more). Natural born or acquired talents, it doesn’t matter; you were given them by someone or something for a reason.
To discover more about your passions and talents, think of:
- What makes you cry with joy.
- What makes you and others smile.
- What people sincerely say you’re good at.
- What makes you and others laugh.
- What keeps you up all night because you’re so fired up about it.
2. Look to your past
It’s difficult sometimes to reflect on our pasts. There are plenty of events I would like to erase from my memory, but I think it’s foolish to do so. Instead, we should use it to move us forward and to make sense of where we are now.
Looking to our pasts to get a sense of our purpose has its own puzzle pieces:
- What circumstances were born into?
Perhaps you were born into poverty. Then your purpose may be to rise above impoverished surroundings and to lead others by example.
- What major mistakes and vices did you parents battle?
Were they abusive, addicted to drugs/alcohol, or did they engage is something else destructive? Well your purpose is not to continue the cycle. You have to break free and again, lead by example.
- What have you failed at?
Failure should never be permanent. It’s only there to separate those who want something more than those who don’t. If a failure of something affected you so much that you couldn’t stop thinking about it, then your purpose is to get back in the game, approach it differently and succeed.
- Who affected you the most in a positive way?
Was it a teacher, author, actor, director, a president, or a local hero? If they changed your life, then perhaps you should carry on their mission as well.
3. There are 4 purposes that unite us all:
1. Be as happy as possible.
2. Live life the way you desire.
3. Change the lives of others. (It often doesn’t take as much as you think)
4. Leave the world a little better than when we were born into it.
And yes to all the negative Nancys and Neds: not everyone will fulfill these purposes, but everyone can.
4. Be open to multiple purposes
Many of us have multiple purposes, but often we have one main mission in life, and then other smaller reasons for existing. Perhaps someone is supposed to be a great parent, but also change the world in another way.
Other times, two different purposes can form into a larger one. I’ve been told that I was pretty good at writing and I should think about turning it into a career, but I always brushed it off. One thing I always wanted to do was change the world. So I decided one day to just combine the two and change the world through my talent of writing.
Our purposes can also vary depending on our age. Commonly it’s materialistic in nature when we’re younger, but not so much when we get older.
This leads me to the fifth piece of the puzzle…
5. Find out what your purpose in the now is
What you’re on this Earth to do today is more important than what your purpose later in life is. Today is guaranteed, tomorrow isn’t.
If you think your purpose it to share your art with the world, then start today! If you feel you’re supposed to be a social entrepreneur, then get going now! You may find something that’ll give your life meaning until the end.
We wait for the perfect moment, but it doesn’t exist. Concentrate on your purpose for today, tomorrow, next month, and for the next few years at the most. Life is now, not tomorrow.
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When we create life lists we always think of the things we desire to do. But we don’t spend enough time or anytime at all, thinking about the things we shouldn’t do in our lives.
This list compiles 15 things to never do in life. Now if you’ve done them don’t worry, every day is a fresh start.
1. Pursue something for money
This has delayed my path to success for years. Every endeavor I undertook was done mainly for the monetary gain. This will almost always lead to failure. And if it does lead to any success, chasing money only makes the journey that much longer. Passion and purpose needs to be the most important aspect of any pursuit. However, following a passion can lead you to riches as well. Check out this video of Gary Vaynerchuk, a successful entrepreneur, talking about how following your passion can also lead to the fortune you desire.
2. Wait for help
Obviously we’re not talking about help as in a 911 emergency. We’re talking about help with success, a financial situation, or changing your life. Many people wait for someone to give them that “big break” when they should be seeking it out. You have to meet destiny halfway.
3. Settle
You should never have a set of goals that once you achieve you’re going to settle down and not pursue any more. You will always need a list of big goals to achieve or your life will lose reason, purpose, and it will be difficult to even get up every morning.
4. Say you don’t have time for your goals
This is the saddest excuse of them all. It’s like saying you don’t have time for your future or time to live. I don’t care what responsibilities you have on your plate, you can and you need to find time.
5. Crush someone’s hopes and dreams
Many can brush off the naysayers but others need as much encouragement as they can. Don’t ever mark someone’s dreams as unrealistic. Their dreams are just as possible as yours.
6. Try to erase your past
All of us go through things in our lives which we would love to forget. But if we did we would be complete fools. It would be like taking years of education from our memory. Remembering and looking back to your past will help you piece together your present and align your future.
7. Think that success happens overnight
This is one of the biggest success myths. Success never happens overnight. Even when someone is voted the next American Idol, it may seem like instant success, but they’ve been working on their music for years, otherwise they wouldn’t be that good.
8. Take every piece of advice to heart
You don’t have to believe all the advice given in this article or any others here on Lyved. The same goes for the rest of your life as well. If you really thought about and believed every tidbit of advice dispensed to you, you’d be giving in to the naysayers.
9. Quit while you’re ahead
Why would you ever quit while you’re ahead of the competition? If anything, work just as hard or even harder to maintain your lead.
10. Strive to be perfect
There really is no such thing as “perfect.” If you’re perfect, you’re basically dead. There’s nothing else to live for.
11. Live in mediocrity
No one should live in obscurity and leave this world without leaving their mark. You don’t have to be celebrity famous, but you must leave a positive impact on people. Even if it’s just one person, you’ll change the world.
12. Be “normal”
This goes along with mediocrity. Why would you want to be normal and fit in? Stand out and be different. Be a red ant in a crowd of black ants.
13. Change your views to please others
Be true to yourself. Never go against what you believe in just to make others happy.
14. Plan more than you act
Planning is necessary to set yourself on the right track but it’s action that gets you results.
15. Expect to get something you’ve never had by doing what you’ve always done
This is one of the simplest and most powerful quotes ever:
“If you want something you’ve never had before, you’ve got to do something you’ve never done before.” – Drina Reed
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You’ve read the lists that compiled the 50 or 100 places and things you must see and do before you die.
These lists are great for reminding you how short life is and for showing you what you’re missing.
This list is a little different; it compiles 50 things to say before you die.
Why such a list? Because you’d be surprised how little people express their selves and say what they need to say to those who matter. You don’t want to be on your deathbed before you utter these words.
You need to say these at the appropriate times and with true meaning behind them. Reading them now does not count.
1. Thanks for everything you’ve done. – Say it to your mother, father, grandmother, or sister; whoever deserves it. Say it when it’s least expected and when it will make the most impact.
2. You’ve changed my life.
3. I need you.
4. I’ve only got one life to live. – This will give you tremendous motivation.
5. Nothing can stop me.
6. I love my life.
7. There’s nothing I’d rather be doing.
8. I can change the world.
9. I will change the world.
10. I have changed the world.
11. I’m rich without money.
12. I’m doing what I was meant to do.
13. I conquered my biggest fear.
14. Glad to help you.
15. I have all the money I need.
16. I don’t care what people think.
17. I’m honest.
18. I’m going for it!
19. I’m proud of myself.
20. I’ve failed.
21. I’ve learned from my failures.
22. I have no regrets. – Many people believe everything happens for a reason. So why would you have any regrets?
23. I don’t like my life – Of course it’s a bad thing to say. But once you’ve acknowledged that you don’t like your life you can now begin to change it.
24. I’ve never had more fun in my life.
25. You hurt me.
26. There’s more to life than this.
27. I love you no matter what.
28. I’ve accomplished a lot.
29. You’ve been successful.
30. I’m listening. – Sometimes it’s more important to listen than to talk.
31. I’m here for you.
32. Words can’t describe the way I feel.
33. I’m not giving up.
34. I don’t have any worries.
35. There is no place like home.
36. It was a pleasure to talk to you.
37. I have all the time in the world.
38. I need a hand.
39. You’re my best friend.
40. I’m glad you were here.
41. I’m just gonna go for it.
42. I can’t thank you enough.
43. I’m trusting my gut.
44. I follow my own path.
45. What a wonderful world.
46. I take full responsibility. – Own up to your mistakes, people will respect you.
47. I’m not sorry. – There are times when you shouldn’t be sorry.
48. I came, I saw, I conquered.
49. I haven’t said enough.
50. I’m not afraid.
Share anything else in the comments below you think is important to for people to say in their lifetime.
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“Just do it.” Three simple words that are simply powerful.
Nike made this phrase famous, but it’s not just a marketing gimmick. All you need is to “just do it” and you will reach a crucial tipping point in which you will go from saying and planning; to doing and proving.
It’s pretty scary to take a plunge into something like “just do it” implies. But here is how you go about it.
Don’t pick a time or day
“Just doing it” shouldn’t be precise; it should come to you out of the blue. There’s no need to pick a day or plan ahead.
Get pissed, get frustrated
I’ll be honest; I’m pissed and frustrated as I write this article right now. But it’s giving me an unbelievable amount of motivation, and even a little adrenaline to go for it.
Instead of fighting, crying, or complaining when you’re frustrated, funnel that energy into focus and action.
Remember that time’s a wastin’
Every month, week, day, hour, and minute you get closer to your end. Nothing will motivate you more to live than death.
Think less, act more
It might be risky, it might get you in trouble, but you must act more than you think. Forget the “what if’s.” F**K all the naysayers and whatever they tell you! Don’t worry if you fail. Don’t think about the money you’ll lose or gain. Be a little stupid and take a lot of action.
Lose these words and phrases
These aren’t real excuses.
“I can’t.”
“I don’t have enough money.”
You don’t need money to take the plunge.
“I don’t have enough time.”
Yes you do! I don’t care how busy you are. You don’t have enough time to wait.
“I don’t know where to start.”
“I don’t know how.”
Start learning. Get your feet wet and you’ll learn along the way.
“Later.”
No, now!
Stop acting like you’re busy
There are a lot of people out there who push papers around and act like they have so many places to go and so much to do. In reality, they’re just avoiding the actions that will get them what they really desire. May be it is because they’re scared or doubtful.
I don’t care who you are; you have time to “just do it” and chase something you want or need. You’ll just have to get less sleep, lose free time, and make lots of other sacrifices.
Know when you’re reaching your tipping point
One of the biggest obstacles keeping people from “just doing it” is not recognizing when they’re about to hit their tipping point.
If you’ve ever found yourself asking, “is this all there is to life?”, then you are closely approaching your tipping point. The same goes if you feel like you’re about to have a nervous breakdown.
You can either succumb to your emotions; or you can stand up, fight, and just go for whatever will make you happy. Once you cross the threshold towards your tipping point, your mind will never be the same and nothing can ever stop you; except yourself.
List what you don’t like about your life
Perhaps it is focusing on negativity a little too much; but grab a piece of paper and write down what you don’t like about your life. May be you don’t have enough money or worse you aren’t happy enough. For those who really want change, it’s enough for them to take the plunge.
Keep in mind:
“Just do it” is much easier said than done. And it should be that way. It separates the people who deserve it from those who don’t.
So what are you waiting for? Get to it! Close your browser window, turn off the tv, put down the book or magazine and get going!
In today’s world, many of us are walking around with a few (or more!) extra pounds we’d like to shed. And most of us seem unable to really let go of this weight permanently, and instead we continue to be uncomfortable in our clothes and in our bodies.
Have you ever thought about how this extra weight might be “serving” you? How in fact, it may be offering a benefit of some sort to you?
Don’t get me wrong here, I am not advocating for extra weight. Instead what I suggest is that you take some time to discover what “benefit” this weight has for you, and then find another solution that will give you the same benefit, without you having to continue holding onto the excess poundage.
And most likely, how this weight is serving you is as a protector of sorts. Protecting you against something you fear, acting as an armor would.
What situations could your weight possibly be protecting you against? I’ve found in my experiences that weight can protect you against all kinds of things! For example, you may fear getting too much attention if you were at your ideal weight. Or perhaps your spouse really likes the extra weight on you, and you worry that he/she might not be so attracted to you if you let it go. Or maybe deep down, you fear having to spend a lot of money on a new wardrobe if you dropped the weight, because finances are tight for you. It could be that you’re worried about being rebuffed by a group of friends who are also on the heavy side. These few examples may strike a chord with you, or maybe not. Everyone’s reasons for staying heavy are personal, and only you can figure them out.
We are all different, and what scares one person exhilarates another. Think of standing at the top of a snow covered mountain. If you love skiing, this would be a really joyful moment for you. However if you are scared of heights, this would be terrifying!
Only you can figure out why you keep the weight, and how it is protecting you and serving you against what it is you truly fear. We are now going to look deeper into ourselves to begin to understand. Please remember that this is a process, and the time frame will differ for everyone. Some of you may have huge AHA moments fairly quickly, and some of you may search for a while, or even a long time before the answers come. There is no set amount of time this will take, everyone is different. Please commit to this process regardless of how long it takes. The results will be worth it, guaranteed!
I recommend that you dedicate some time everyday to working on this. Find a quiet spot, where you wont be interrupted, and really focus on this. It can be lying in bed first thing in the morning or just before you drop off at night. It can be at lunch as you take a stroll through a park. Or it can even be locking yourself up in the bathroom for five minutes of privacy! No matter where you choose to do this exercise, it is very important that you be kind to yourself, really kind. Occasionally things will come up that are uncomfortable for you, sometimes very uncomfortable. However, carrying around your extra weight is uncomfortable too, so rest assured that this exercise will help to release all the discomfort, both mental and physical.
What I mean by being kind to yourself is by not judging what you discover. You may have an AHA that seems so obvious now, that you wonder how you ever missed it. And then that can lead to thoughts along the lines of how could I have missed that, I am so stupid. Really listen to your self-talk as you go along through this, and when you catch yourself berating yourself (and you will, you are only human!) replace that thought with something more positive and self-loving. For instance, instead of the thought how could I have missed that, what is wrong with me?, catch yourself thinking this, and then consciously say to yourself I am so grateful that I have made a discovery about my weight, and I am so happy now that I can find new, more effective ways of coping.
Everyone is different, and this is a really personal part of the process. There are no right and wrong answers here! This is really getting to know yourself on a level much deeper than you have probably ventured before.
You are afraid of something, even if you dont think you are. You are human, that means you have fear, probably for more than one thing. Remember, these discoveries will take some time, so dont rush through the process. Go slow, and appreciate every piece of data you find about yourself and your fears. It can be fascinating really getting to know yourself, to uncover what drives you to do what you do. Remember to be kind to yourself, and not judgmental. Just notice what comes up for you.
If you are not already doing so, you are going to begin today writing down your thoughts. Keeping a journal or a diary is a great tool to help you figure all this out for yourself. Start by writing every day, even if it is just for 5-10 minutes. Dont censor yourself. Rather, keep your journal hidden away from prying eyes, so that you can be completely honest in your writing because you dont have to worry that someone else will read it.
As you write, be sure to make note of your feelings that day. How did you feel when you woke up? At midday? After work? In the evening? How did you feel about yourself and your body? What challenges came up for you that day?
Note whether you had a day that moved you closer to your goals (of shedding the weight), or moved you further away (overeating or skipping exercise). In either case, pay attention to the details of the day. Did you wake up in a good mood or bad? Did your mood change during the course of the day? Who were you with? What did you talk about? What activities were you involved in? Then move into the less tangible aspects of the day, such as What were you thinking about? What thoughts were you holding about yourself? Who or what were you afraid of? What makes you uncomfortable? When do I feel the need to overeat?
Look for patterns between what you are doing, who you are doing it with, how you feel, and what you are thinking. Look for these patterns in both the negative, as well as positive aspects of your day. These patterns are there, you just have to find them. Everyones patterns are different, but we all have things that trigger us to think and behave in certain ways. Becoming aware of these patterns is the first step in changing them.
Awareness and realization usually come along in small increments. Each day you may learn something new about yourself and how you cope with the world. And as this new knowledge begins to pile up, you will find yourself naturally making changes in how you think, react and behave. By thinking differently about your body and your weight, you will develop new behaviors which will get you to your goal of life in an ideal-weighted body. You can escape from the armor of fat and get on with living life to the fullest!
To your success!
Written by Stacey Grieve
Stacey Grieve is the foremost expert on the mind-body connection and how it fits into weight. As an overweight child who grew into an obese adult, Stacey spent the first half of her life battling with her weight and her body. It wasn’t until she effectively learned how to use the mind-body connection that permanent weight results began to appear and she now passionately shares what she’s learned with others so they too can achieve and maintain their ideal weight.
To check out Stacey’s book and website please visit here: Why Are You Weighting?
