Success
This is a guest post.
It’s hard to come across a blog about personal development or self improvement these days that doesn’t mention goals and how to go about turning them into a reality. After-all, whether they are big or small, we all have them. Common goals include the desire to get out of debt, finding a partner, increasing productivity or even something more challenging like escaping the rat race.
The typical goal achievement cycle you usually read about tends to go something like this: focus on what you want, map out a plan to get it, and stay consistent until you succeed.
If we break things down to their core level, that three step plan is actually enough. That advice really is all we need. If things are that simple though, why do so many people fail to achieve their goals? Is it because they are lazy? Is it because they are complacent? Is it because they don’t want things badly enough?
Maybe. More likely, it’s often a combination of these things. Instead of trying to pick apart all the possible reasons why people might stumble on their path to achievement, I want to share a simple exercise that will give you your own answers. This is a very simple idea, it will take 24 hours, and the results will dramatically improve your chances of goal achievement.
The Exercise
Before I tell you what you need to do, I want to lay down a basic foundation. Something fairly obvious, but often forgotten, is that your current life situation is nothing more than the result of your actions. Your health, your finances, your happiness and everything else. Their current progress is based on your current output. For example, if you ate sensibly and did 50 sit-ups every day, your beer belly would flatten and your stomach muscles would start to tone.
Similarly, if you went jogging every day, your level of fitness and your stamina would improve. If you save a percentage of your income each month, you are going to have a tidy sum in savings at the end of the year. If you perform the actions, life has no choice but to reward you with the results. In essence, all you need to remember is that your current situation is completely based on your current actions.
Therefore, to change that situation, you need to change your actions. Yet, we can’t know where we are going wrong until we identify what those actions are. Remember I said that this exercise was going to be simple? Well, that’s because it is. What I recommend you do, on a typical day in your life, is record every single action you take. That’s it, really!
Of course, you don’t have to write down visits to the bathroom, but things like the time you woke up, what you did for lunch (and for how long), what work you actually completed in the day, how much time you spent checking emails and that kind of thing. This isn’t exciting (it isn’t supposed to be) but it only takes one day, and you’ll be left with clear results of where your time is being spent.
The results of this exercise will mean different things to different people. If you’re trying to grow a business and it’s not going anywhere, you’ll probably realise that you’re spending too much time on ineffective activities. Similarly, if you want to lose weight but don’t exercise and instead you binge eat, it will be clear why your progress is slow or even non existent.
The reason this exercise works so well is because:
- You get to see a clear, concise output of how your day looks
- You can’t fool yourself about being busy or being effective, it’s all written down
- It will make it easy to identify time wasters in your life
A lot of people will read this idea, and, even if they like it, will simply dismiss it. I know because I used to be that type of person myself. Instead, why not give it a shot? This is an exercise for one day of your life that will give you a clear view of where your time is going and perhaps more critically, where your time is not.
Don’t forget: life is just outputting whatever you put in. If you daily log doesn’t show a list of actions you’re happy with, at least you can now change that. I performed this same exercise around 2 months ago and I’m now much healthier, far more productive, and I make a lot more money.
What do you have to lose?
Written by Glen Allsopp
Glen is a blogger who writes on the subject of Personal Development. He also tackles topics such as Personality Development in order to help people realise they can be who they want to be.
Dreaming is fun, achieving those dreams isn’t always so enjoyable. If you want the things you desire, you’re going to need to work your ass off.
But it isn’t a matter of just doing a lot for a long time. There are different approaches to use along with working hard and you need to find a balance. It’s almost like an art form.
This is the art of hard work.
Work smarter while working harder
One of the new sayings I’ve been hearing more and more is frustrating me more and more; “Don’t work harder, work smarter.” I feel like a lot of people are taking it out of context and see it as advice to find the easiest and shortest way to achieving a goal.
I look at working smarter not as the quickest route or cheating, but as learning from yesterdays mistakes so that you won’t repeat them again.
If you want to achieve a goal you need to not only work smarter, you need to work harder than you have been.
Hard work can be mental work
Hard work may only seem like back breaking labor but there are a lot of people who are putting their minds to hard work. Most tasks that require you to do so are creative such as writing. When you’re doing mental work people might label you as “lazy” because they don’t see you running around, digging ditches, and lifting heavy items.
You need a little patience (or a lot)
Patience is an action you need to take with all your hard work. The results from doing hard work can take a long time to enjoy so you have to find patience to keep you going forward and sane.
Don’t get discourage though, because hard work does eventually produce results. When there’s an action, there has to be a reaction.
Know that good work is hard
Even if you’re doing noble work like helping the homeless, building wells in Africa, and changing lives, it’s going to be hard work. And a lot of the times it’s going to be harder than doing selfish work, perhaps that’s the reason not everyone does it.
Know what to sacrifice and what not to
When you’re working hard you’re going to have to make sacrifices. There’s no way around it. But you need to prioritize and know what is worth sacrificing and what isn’t worth missing.
A few things worth sacrificing:
- A meal – If you’re healthy enough and have enough energy, it might be worth skipping a lunch or dinner once and a while to give yourself more time to achieve a goal.
- Partying – I’m taking about going to get drunk. What’s the fun in it first of all? And secondly, what good are you getting from it, especially with regards to productivity?
- Shopping – If you don’t need anything, try not to go for the fun of it. You spend money you don’t need to spend and you’ll have more junk to cram in your house.
What’s not worth sacrificing:
- Your life – Your life consists of time with family, memories to be made, and stopping to smell the roses.
Don’t get so swept up with achieving goals and a better life that you forget to enjoy the life you already have. Here are a few questions that will help you evaluate what’s worth giving up to get more done and what’s not.
- Is this a once and a lifetime event?
- Is this a “first”?
- Is this a “last”?
- Who’s getting old and might not be around much longer for me to see?
- How much time do I need to give up?
- Am I working so hard to achieve what I already have?
Be your biggest competitor
Working harder than other people is important, but your biggest competition is you. You’ve got to work harder and more efficient than you did in the past and you need to do things differently than you have been to achieve something you’ve never had.
The key to making hard work easier
Hard work can become less like “work” when you have passion and find purpose in what you’re doing.
Writing for this site and promoting it is often hard work, but what makes it so enjoyable is knowing that what I write helps people. It keeps me going and when I receive an email or a comment from a reader telling me how much they enjoy my writing it puts a smile on my face and the hard work doesn’t seem like “work” anymore.
Do you practice the art of hard work? What works for you and what doesn’t? Please share any tips you might have in the comments below.
Related articles:
- Recovery; your missing element for success?
- 5 easy pieces to piecing together your purpose in life
- The art of getting off your ass
Persistence, persistence, persistence. It’s one step to achieving success that needs to be taken every single day.
However, all of us have given up on achieving something; and most of us have done it a lot that it has turned into a habit.
We probably gave up not long after we began or we gave up when we thought we had much longer to go, when in reality, success was only around the corner.
Bad habits like smoking have to be given up, but when it comes to dreams and goals; the ones that keep you up at night and you constantly think about, you can’t simply abandon ship.
It’s time for you to give up your giving up habit! Here’s how:
Identify why you give up
The first step you need to take is to figure out why you give up up goals. There could be a million reasons.
Such as:
- You thought you didn’t have enough money
- The naysayers got to you
- There was too much work
- You were working too long and not getting many results
- Your fears got in the way
- You focused too much on your weaknesses
Create positive pressure
One of the simplest, yet most powerful ways to keep yourself from giving up is to get positive pressure from friends and family.
Tell those who you truly trust what dreams and goals you’re working to achieve in the near future. They’ll help you, without really knowing; to not give up. They will ask how you’re doing with your pursuits; they might give you suggestions and advice. And lastly, they’ll give you positive pressure because you wouldn’t want to disappoint them by giving up. You want to make them proud.
I wouldn’t recommend telling “friends” and family who are constantly negative and belittle your ambitions, if they demotivate you. However, perhaps for you, these people may light a fiercer fire underneath your feet than anyone else because you want to prove them wrong. If that’s so, then share your dreams and goals with them too to add fuel to the flames.
Change your approach
When success is eluding you for what seems like forever, it may be a perfect time to modify your approach. You might be tackling a task in the wrong way and that is why you haven’t achieved much yet.
Here are a few ways to switch you approach:
- Instead of looking to earn a lot of money, put value and people first and money last.
- Extend the time in which you think you’ll achieve a goal. This might help relieve a little pressure and help you focus on the extended view of things, where success lies.
- Work on a goal every single day instead of every once and awhile.
- Add in some fun! Make sure you’re enjoying everything about the pursuit, even the hard work.
When you change an approach, your goal will remain the same, just the road to it may be from a different direction.
Throw out the “overnight” success concept
It’s one of the biggest misconceptions regarding success; that it’s often achieved overnight. It’s a main reason why people give up. It was for me.
Here’s a great quote from Eddie Cantor that sums up the reality of overnight success:
“It takes twenty years to become an overnight success.”
Remind yourself of what’s at stake
You’ve got to remember the main reasons why you need to achieve a goal. It could be to leave a job you hate, to get a better life for you and your loved ones, or it could be so you can change the world.
When you remind yourself of who’s counting on you and the high stakes of something that isn’t a game it’ll be harder for you to quit.
Take a break
Instead of outright giving up, perhaps you’re just burnt out and need a break to recharge.
Maybe you’ll greatly benefit from a few weeks or a month off.
Lay your excuses to rest
“I don’t have enough time.” “I don’t have enough money.” “I’m stupid.” “My life sucks.”
These excuses that many people give may seem legitimate reasons for giving up, however they’re anything but. They’re pathetic.
Criticism is tough to deal with.
Constructive criticism is much easier but it’s rarely given because most people don’t want to take the time to be helpful.
However, you can certainly ease the pain of regular criticism and turn it into something that helps you.
Here are 7 easy ways to do so.
1. Identify where it’s coming from
People don’t criticize others for no reason. It could be a person’s job, if they’re a critic, but most likely it comes from jealously or from other emotions.
When you’re criticized, ask yourself:
- Is this person jealous?
- Am I more successful than them?
- Is this person just always in a negative mood?
Jealously is probably the biggest driving force for criticism. It’s difficult to see someone else succeed where you failed.
2. Identify who the critic is
If you’re getting criticized on the internet, it’s most likely going to be from trolls and I wouldn’t concern yourself with them or waste much time responding to them.
For offline, find out more information about the person criticizing you. See how much of a success they are and what they do for a living.
3. Evaluate the maturity of the criticism
Most criticisms are very childish sounding. If that’s the type of negative comments you get then I wouldn’t worry about the criticism.
4. Accept the criticism
Criticisms usually have a bit of truth to them, so it might be beneficial to not be in denial and just accept it.
5. Use it to better yourself
Once you’ve accepted the criticism from a source you respect, then it’s time to get to work. Decide how you can become better in the area you were criticized for. But be sure to also remind yourself of what you’re excellent at.
6. Don’t criticize the critic
You don’t always need to fight back or bring yourself down to the level of the critic. Try to reply by saying “thanks for your comment.” That usually quiets people up pretty quick, especially those trying to push your buttons.
7. Know that if you’re not criticized, you’re not successful
I wouldn’t worry about being criticized. What I would be worried about is when I’m not being criticized. It means that you’re not being successful with what you do. Success comes from standing out and being different. And there’s no way to be different and stand out without being criticized.
Related articles:
- Escaping Cape Fear: 9 Ways To Not Let Fear Stop You
- Dealing with negativity: 8 ways to beat the naysayers
This is a guest post.
These are stressful times – the ratio of things out of our control now far exceeds the number of variables – economic, social or otherwise – that are in control and it has created previously unseen levels of stress, anxiety and uncertainty that disrupts our lives and our careers.
I wrote Road Rules: Be The Truck. Not The Squirrel. to help us all better navigate our journeys down the road of life in all weather conditions. Whether on a bright, sunny and clear day or a dark, stormy and foggy day, we are all drivers on the road of life and are all trying to safely and properly arrive at our destinations. We must share the road – the road does not belong to you alone and you are not alone on the journey. We are obligated to drive in a manner which allows others to reach their destination and commit ourselves to playing tour guide or central dispatcher (via coaching, mentoring, consulting or friendship) for those who are trying to travel the roads that you have already successfully navigated.
The skills and discipline to understand how adverse weather conditions affect your path in life is critical to both survival and success. When the going gets tough, the tough get going. You will not always have a warning sign when weather conditions change quickly and you will need to adjust your driving style accordingly. The ability to adjust your driving skills and the characteristics of your vehicle to current weather conditions is also a metaphor for how you need to live your life. We put snow tires or even chains on our vehicles to adjust to snow and ice in the harsh winters and then take them off when Spring approaches. What adjustments do you need to make to your outlooks, perspectives and actions as weather conditions or seasons in your life change?
The successful people that I know and respect are durable and flexible. They avoid “one trick ponyism” and pay careful attention to weather and road conditions and adjust accordingly. They instinctively know when it is okay to drive faster on a clear and open road and when to slow down when navigating an icy downhill path. Others seem to have been built to move at only one pace – they travel only at high speed and eventually crash and burn or move too slowly and the opportunities pass them by. Others often carry cargo which is either too far ahead of its time or which is stale, rotten or obsolete by the time it reaches its destination.
As discussed in Road Rules, being the truck and not the squirrel depends on your willingness to be decisive as part of your commitment to being an all weather driver. Trucks have drivers that are willing to make decisions fairly quickly and be accountable for the results of their decisions, good or bad. They neither make decisions too quickly nor vacillate until it is truly too late. They are trained to understand the consequences of their actions (or inactions). Colin Powell said “if you have less than 40% of the information you need to make a decision, then it is probably too soon. If you have more than 70%, it is probably too late.” General George S. Patton said “a good plan passionately executed today is far and away better than a perfect plan tomorrow.” These were both generals who understood the difference between losing a battle and winning the war.
Being a truck demands that your decision-making systems (who makes decisions, how they are made, when they are made and what adjustments are made in response to road blocks) must allow for (and tolerate) lost battles as long as the focus long-term is on winning the war.
In our travels down the road of life, we will encounter winter driving conditions (some of us more than others). There is no safe speed when driving on snow and ice. Every stretch of highway will appear differently depending on the time of day, the temperature, the severity and intensity of the snow, the angle of the sun, the degree of salting and road treatment, etc. – but you can be assured that it will be dangerous. You will need to adjust your driving style and provide more space between you and the other drivers. You will need to start slowing down sooner before you come to an intersection or make a turn. You will need to keep special supplies on hand in the event that you get stuck or the weather intensifies. You must take the time to really get a feel for the roadway and test your brakes from time to time to find out how well you can stop. Your critical fluids – anti-freeze, gasoline, oil and windshield fluid should all be filled to capacity.
This also a time when our metaphysical connections and bonds to our work and our careers often takes a nose dive. We feel underappreciated, overworked, underpaid, understimulated and over-taxed. Our expectations about pay, bonuses, benefits and job security are not directly aligned with the level of effort and commitment that is expected of us – and that’s just to keep our jobs, let alone advance up the corporate ladder. We crave enlightenment and spiritual insight in a post-9/11 and post-Enron world, yet we are quick to discard these cravings when we are worried about making mortgage payments on a timely basis. I would submit to you that troubled times are when we must embrace our core values and quest for authenticity and wisdom, not abandon it.
When you are facing less (or no) vacation time, this is not the circumstance to start hating your work even more, it is a time to embrace the teachings of the Zen Master who loves his vocation so much that he is no longer able to distinguish between his work and his play. Don’t get me wrong, if you are not getting this level of fulfillment from your current job, then it is a good time to consider change, but taking yourself completely off the highway of life is not on option. Recalibrate any lofty financial goals in exchange for meaningful work that you can embrace each day with passion and I promise you that the financial rewards will soon follow.
Let’s take a look at a summary of a few key points and observations from some of my favorite road rules:
1. Be The Truck. Not The Squirrel. On the ecosystem of the highway of life, strive to be closer to the truck than the squirrel. The truck drives confidently down the road of life as a carrier of valuable cargo for the benefit of others. Its mission is purposeful and directed – it is trying to get to a particular destination, deliver its goods and return to the road for its next task. The truck remains focused on its goals – you’ll never see a truck out for a casual Sunday afternoon drive. The squirrel spends its days scampering around with no apparent mission or purpose, randomly searching for its next acorn and all too often, winds up crushed by the truck as roadkill. The truck did not intend to kill the squirrel but was unable to save those creatures that get in the way of its path who are unable or unwilling to help themselves. Like the deer in the headlights who just freezes before its peril, we must be dedicated to a life of purposeful decision-making, especially in these difficult economic times. Whether a move to the left or the right was ultimately the right decision is less relevant than your willingness to move fast enough to avoid a fatal collision.
2. Share the Road. The road of life does not belong to you alone on this journey. These are the two critical messages of the book’s second road rule. First, share the road. How many times have we seen other drivers, either on the road of life or on our actual highways cut off others as if their ability to reach their intended destination was more important than the rest of us. It is as if none of the rest of really mattered. We cannot live our lives in this selfish vacuum, especially in a post 9-11 and post-Enron society. We prosper by helping others to prosper. We embrace the notion that everyone’s attempt to reach their goals in life are equally important. One of us can never be more important than all of us. Second, we are not alone on this journey. We all have an obligation to play tour guide to those who are trying to travel the roads that we have already mastered. Be a coach, a mentor, a friend to those who are trying to get to where you have already been. Our interconnected society driven by the internet, PDA’s and social networks allow us to help each other in ways never imaginable and it will only get better and stronger as technology requires. I am old enough to remember the excitement of connecting with another driver on a CB radio, who could warn me of the detours and challenges that may lie ahead. We are now empowered to support each other in that same way, but where a few key strokes on to a device that sits in the palm of our hand can influence and improve the journey of thousands of other drivers on the road of life in a matter of milliseconds. Wow – I look so forward to the road ahead.
3. Be An All Weather Driver. In this road rule, I was guided by a parable which reminds us all that if we only walk our paths on bright sunny days and on trails which are smooth and flat and on days where we feel healthy and invigorated and when we are wearing all the right gear and have all the right supplies, then we’ll never reach our destination. To act only when conditions are perfect is essentially to not act at all. There will never be a time or a place when all of your driving conditions on the road of life will be ideal. You must commit to being an all-weather driver and an all-weather friend. We all can remember the phrase which goes back to our school-aged years about Billy or Susie being a “fair-weathered” friend. These were the people who were your best friend whenever things were going great, but were nowhere to be found when the proverbial sh*!?+ hit the fan. Well, I can promise you that Billy and Susie are probably still living their lives in that fickle and unreliable manner and it is not serving them well on their journey. The truck must proceed in its journey and adapt its driving style accordingly in the worst of ice, snow, fog, hail, rain or the wheels of commerce come to a halt. The truck accepts that fact that not all roads or driving conditions will be perfect, but agrees to enter the highway of life each day either way.
4. Accidents Can Happen To Even The Best Drivers. This road rule is based in part on one of my favorite and most practical books, When Bad Things Happen To Good People, by Rabbi Harold Kushner. In his book, Kushner reminds us that we can commit to live our lives in a good and decent way and still stumble from time to time. There are circumstances we can control and many that we cannot, but that does not excuse or justify an abandonment of the rules or disavow a commitment to live a life of purpose and meaning just because something bad could still happen. When a 55 year old marathon runner has a heart attack unexpectedly, it is not likely that they lay on the hospital operating table, wishing that they had been an overweight couch potato. We must commit our lives to being good and considerate drivers on the road of life (and on the actual highways) free from distraction, discourtesy and drugs or alcohol which influence our abilities and accept the fact that we may still have accidents notwithstanding our good habits. The fear of an accident cannot be an excuse for not entering the highway or we’ll never reach our destination. Everything in life has its risks and the most successful people and companies that I have ever met learn how to manage and mitigate these risks by accepting the fact that risk or stress-avoidance is a misnomer and a fantasy. Anything you can do to mitigate the impact of the accident and ensure that it is not fatal to you or others on the road will serve you well in life.
For more insights on being an enlightened driver on the road of life, take a look at www.bethetruck.com. I would also strongly encourage you to share with me your own driving war stories, parables and metaphors, advice particularly those that have influenced your driving style or your intended destination.
Written by Andrew J. Sherman
ANDREW J. SHERMAN is a Partner in the Washington, D.C. office of Jones Day, with over 2,300 attorneys worldwide. Mr. Sherman is a recognized international authority on the legal and strategic issues affecting small and growing companies. Mr. Sherman is an Adjunct Professor in the Masters of Business Administration (MBA) program at the University of Maryland and Georgetown University where he has taught courses on business growth, capital formation and entrepreneurship for over twenty (20) years.
Mr. Sherman is the author of seventeen (17) books on the legal and strategic aspects of business growth and capital formation. His most recently published books include the recent three-part Kaplan business growth series, Grow Fast Grow Right (November 2006), as well as Build Fast Build Right and Start Fast Start Right, published by Kaplan in the Spring of 2007. His eighteenth (18th) book, Road Rules Be the Truck. Not the Squirrel. is an inspirational book which was published in the Fall of 2008. Mr. Sherman can be reached at 202-879-3686 or e-mail ajsherman (at) jonesday.com.
