Success
These are stressful times – the ratio of things out of our control now far exceeds the number of variables – economic, social or otherwise – that are in control and it has created previously unseen levels of stress, anxiety and uncertainty that disrupts our lives and our careers.
I wrote Road Rules: Be The Truck. Not The Squirrel. to help us all better navigate our journeys down the road of life in all weather conditions. Whether on a bright, sunny and clear day or a dark, stormy and foggy day, we are all drivers on the road of life and are all trying to safely and properly arrive at our destinations. We must share the road – the road does not belong to you alone and you are not alone on the journey. We are obligated to drive in a manner which allows others to reach their destination and commit ourselves to playing tour guide or central dispatcher (via coaching, mentoring, consulting or friendship) for those who are trying to travel the roads that you have already successfully navigated.
The skills and discipline to understand how adverse weather conditions affect your path in life is critical to both survival and success. When the going gets tough, the tough get going. You will not always have a warning sign when weather conditions change quickly and you will need to adjust your driving style accordingly. The ability to adjust your driving skills and the characteristics of your vehicle to current weather conditions is also a metaphor for how you need to live your life. We put snow tires or even chains on our vehicles to adjust to snow and ice in the harsh winters and then take them off when Spring approaches. What adjustments do you need to make to your outlooks, perspectives and actions as weather conditions or seasons in your life change?
The successful people that I know and respect are durable and flexible. They avoid “one trick ponyism” and pay careful attention to weather and road conditions and adjust accordingly. They instinctively know when it is okay to drive faster on a clear and open road and when to slow down when navigating an icy downhill path. Others seem to have been built to move at only one pace – they travel only at high speed and eventually crash and burn or move too slowly and the opportunities pass them by. Others often carry cargo which is either too far ahead of its time or which is stale, rotten or obsolete by the time it reaches its destination.
As discussed in Road Rules, being the truck and not the squirrel depends on your willingness to be decisive as part of your commitment to being an all weather driver. Trucks have drivers that are willing to make decisions fairly quickly and be accountable for the results of their decisions, good or bad. They neither make decisions too quickly nor vacillate until it is truly too late. They are trained to understand the consequences of their actions (or inactions). Colin Powell said “if you have less than 40% of the information you need to make a decision, then it is probably too soon. If you have more than 70%, it is probably too late.” General George S. Patton said “a good plan passionately executed today is far and away better than a perfect plan tomorrow.” These were both generals who understood the difference between losing a battle and winning the war.
Being a truck demands that your decision-making systems (who makes decisions, how they are made, when they are made and what adjustments are made in response to road blocks) must allow for (and tolerate) lost battles as long as the focus long-term is on winning the war.
In our travels down the road of life, we will encounter winter driving conditions (some of us more than others). There is no safe speed when driving on snow and ice. Every stretch of highway will appear differently depending on the time of day, the temperature, the severity and intensity of the snow, the angle of the sun, the degree of salting and road treatment, etc. – but you can be assured that it will be dangerous. You will need to adjust your driving style and provide more space between you and the other drivers. You will need to start slowing down sooner before you come to an intersection or make a turn. You will need to keep special supplies on hand in the event that you get stuck or the weather intensifies. You must take the time to really get a feel for the roadway and test your brakes from time to time to find out how well you can stop. Your critical fluids – anti-freeze, gasoline, oil and windshield fluid should all be filled to capacity.
This also a time when our metaphysical connections and bonds to our work and our careers often takes a nose dive. We feel underappreciated, overworked, underpaid, understimulated and over-taxed. Our expectations about pay, bonuses, benefits and job security are not directly aligned with the level of effort and commitment that is expected of us – and that’s just to keep our jobs, let alone advance up the corporate ladder. We crave enlightenment and spiritual insight in a post-9/11 and post-Enron world, yet we are quick to discard these cravings when we are worried about making mortgage payments on a timely basis. I would submit to you that troubled times are when we must embrace our core values and quest for authenticity and wisdom, not abandon it.
When you are facing less (or no) vacation time, this is not the circumstance to start hating your work even more, it is a time to embrace the teachings of the Zen Master who loves his vocation so much that he is no longer able to distinguish between his work and his play. Don’t get me wrong, if you are not getting this level of fulfillment from your current job, then it is a good time to consider change, but taking yourself completely off the highway of life is not on option. Recalibrate any lofty financial goals in exchange for meaningful work that you can embrace each day with passion and I promise you that the financial rewards will soon follow.
Let’s take a look at a summary of a few key points and observations from some of my favorite road rules:
1. Be The Truck. Not The Squirrel. On the ecosystem of the highway of life, strive to be closer to the truck than the squirrel. The truck drives confidently down the road of life as a carrier of valuable cargo for the benefit of others. Its mission is purposeful and directed – it is trying to get to a particular destination, deliver its goods and return to the road for its next task. The truck remains focused on its goals – you’ll never see a truck out for a casual Sunday afternoon drive. The squirrel spends its days scampering around with no apparent mission or purpose, randomly searching for its next acorn and all too often, winds up crushed by the truck as roadkill. The truck did not intend to kill the squirrel but was unable to save those creatures that get in the way of its path who are unable or unwilling to help themselves. Like the deer in the headlights who just freezes before its peril, we must be dedicated to a life of purposeful decision-making, especially in these difficult economic times. Whether a move to the left or the right was ultimately the right decision is less relevant than your willingness to move fast enough to avoid a fatal collision.
2. Share the Road. The road of life does not belong to you alone on this journey. These are the two critical messages of the book’s second road rule. First, share the road. How many times have we seen other drivers, either on the road of life or on our actual highways cut off others as if their ability to reach their intended destination was more important than the rest of us. It is as if none of the rest of really mattered. We cannot live our lives in this selfish vacuum, especially in a post 9-11 and post-Enron society. We prosper by helping others to prosper. We embrace the notion that everyone’s attempt to reach their goals in life are equally important. One of us can never be more important than all of us. Second, we are not alone on this journey. We all have an obligation to play tour guide to those who are trying to travel the roads that we have already mastered. Be a coach, a mentor, a friend to those who are trying to get to where you have already been. Our interconnected society driven by the internet, PDA’s and social networks allow us to help each other in ways never imaginable and it will only get better and stronger as technology requires. I am old enough to remember the excitement of connecting with another driver on a CB radio, who could warn me of the detours and challenges that may lie ahead. We are now empowered to support each other in that same way, but where a few key strokes on to a device that sits in the palm of our hand can influence and improve the journey of thousands of other drivers on the road of life in a matter of milliseconds. Wow – I look so forward to the road ahead.
3. Be An All Weather Driver. In this road rule, I was guided by a parable which reminds us all that if we only walk our paths on bright sunny days and on trails which are smooth and flat and on days where we feel healthy and invigorated and when we are wearing all the right gear and have all the right supplies, then we’ll never reach our destination. To act only when conditions are perfect is essentially to not act at all. There will never be a time or a place when all of your driving conditions on the road of life will be ideal. You must commit to being an all-weather driver and an all-weather friend. We all can remember the phrase which goes back to our school-aged years about Billy or Susie being a “fair-weathered” friend. These were the people who were your best friend whenever things were going great, but were nowhere to be found when the proverbial sh*!?+ hit the fan. Well, I can promise you that Billy and Susie are probably still living their lives in that fickle and unreliable manner and it is not serving them well on their journey. The truck must proceed in its journey and adapt its driving style accordingly in the worst of ice, snow, fog, hail, rain or the wheels of commerce come to a halt. The truck accepts that fact that not all roads or driving conditions will be perfect, but agrees to enter the highway of life each day either way.
4. Accidents Can Happen To Even The Best Drivers. This road rule is based in part on one of my favorite and most practical books, When Bad Things Happen To Good People, by Rabbi Harold Kushner. In his book, Kushner reminds us that we can commit to live our lives in a good and decent way and still stumble from time to time. There are circumstances we can control and many that we cannot, but that does not excuse or justify an abandonment of the rules or disavow a commitment to live a life of purpose and meaning just because something bad could still happen. When a 55 year old marathon runner has a heart attack unexpectedly, it is not likely that they lay on the hospital operating table, wishing that they had been an overweight couch potato. We must commit our lives to being good and considerate drivers on the road of life (and on the actual highways) free from distraction, discourtesy and drugs or alcohol which influence our abilities and accept the fact that we may still have accidents notwithstanding our good habits. The fear of an accident cannot be an excuse for not entering the highway or we’ll never reach our destination. Everything in life has its risks and the most successful people and companies that I have ever met learn how to manage and mitigate these risks by accepting the fact that risk or stress-avoidance is a misnomer and a fantasy. Anything you can do to mitigate the impact of the accident and ensure that it is not fatal to you or others on the road will serve you well in life.
For more insights on being an enlightened driver on the road of life, take a look at www.bethetruck.com. I would also strongly encourage you to share with me your own driving war stories, parables and metaphors, advice particularly those that have influenced your driving style or your intended destination.
Written by Andrew J. Sherman
ANDREW J. SHERMAN is a Partner in the Washington, D.C. office of Jones Day, with over 2,300 attorneys worldwide. Mr. Sherman is a recognized international authority on the legal and strategic issues affecting small and growing companies. Mr. Sherman is an Adjunct Professor in the Masters of Business Administration (MBA) program at the University of Maryland and Georgetown University where he has taught courses on business growth, capital formation and entrepreneurship for over twenty (20) years.
Mr. Sherman is the author of seventeen (17) books on the legal and strategic aspects of business growth and capital formation. His most recently published books include the recent three-part Kaplan business growth series, Grow Fast Grow Right (November 2006), as well as Build Fast Build Right and Start Fast Start Right, published by Kaplan in the Spring of 2007. His eighteenth (18th) book, Road Rules Be the Truck. Not the Squirrel. is an inspirational book which was published in the Fall of 2008. Mr. Sherman can be reached at 202-879-3686 or e-mail ajsherman (at) jonesday.com.
The title of this post is a bit of an irony, but despite conventional thought, there are many ways to successfully fail.
I’ve been an entrepreneur since I was 14 years old. I’ve failed countless times over those years and I still fail today. I used to erase the failures from my memory but then I began to realize that was an even bigger mistake.
Failures happen for a reason. Failure weeds out those who NEED it; be it a goal or success, from those who just WANT it.
Failing successfully takes a lot of work, time, and self-discipline. Here are 10 ways to do it, broken down into 3 major categories.
Using your failures
1. Use failure to connect with people
Failure is something that unites us all. Don’t be afraid to make your mistakes and failures public. When you do, also make public the lessons you’ve learned.
You’d be surprised as to how much better you can connect with clients, readers, friends, and even the very successful. Portraying an image of being perfect is what puts people off.
2. Failure, then success makes for a good story
The media is always interested in rags to riches, underdog, and redemption stories. Again, share your story and the lessons you learned in pitches you may give to reporters and writers. This isn’t for everyone, but for bloggers, entrepreneurs, musicians, artists, and writers, this can set you apart.
It might help you get in a magazine, on TV, or heck, maybe even on the silver screen.
3. Learn
This is probably the simplest and most common item on the list. If you don’t fail you aren’t learning and you aren’t even living.
Failures can teach you:
- About yourself, including strengths and weaknesses
- About others
- What you like and don’t like
- Lessons that can’t be taught in any school
4. Teach others
Write a book, blog, become a mentor, or actually become a teacher. Sure, people have to make mistakes on their own, but they can learn a lot from yours as well.
Not accepting your failures
5. Reevaluate why you failed
Lack of focus, too many priorities, not enough passion; there’s plenty of reasons why you could of failed.
Take a few moments, look over your plan, and ask yourself:
- Did I not give myself enough time?
- Did I LOVE, not just like, what I was doing?
- Did I let others stop me?
- Did I let my fears stop me?
6. Readjust your plan
People always say “never give up.” But how do you not give up when things aren’t working right? Simple, you readjust your plan.
The main goal or end result you desire to achieve shouldn’t change, but your approach should if it’s not working.
Here are some aspects of your plan you can readjust:
- Time frames – You might want to give yourself more time. Or if you put your goal so far down the road, say 5 years, that you aren’t taking daily steps to get there, then give yourself less time.
- Amounts – Do you really need to make a billion dollars? Sometimes we want so much, when we only need much less.
- Steps – Don’t forget the baby steps. They’re often more important than the major ones.
7. Take a break
Sometimes that is all you need. A few months break from persistent action towards a goal. Take the time to brainstorm and re-motivate yourself, then jump back in.
Denying it was failure
Hmm… Who thought denial was good?
8. Change the word
Remove “failure” from your vocabulary and replace it with something else like “hiccup” or “lesson.”
9. Consider it a step
If you believe that everything happens for a reason, then “failure” doesn’t exist. It’s really a step towards success.
10. Make failure not an option
Have you ever considered putting it ALL on the line so that it becomes such a desperate situation that you deny failure as an option?
Once you begin to understand that failure isn’t that bad, then you begin to take more risks and ultimately you will achieve your goals. That’s the ultimate way of failing successfully.
What are some other ways to fail successfully? If you know of any, please share in the comments below. We’d all love to read them.
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From January 1st to the 31st, everyone has big goals for the new year. But most people forget about pursuing them by February.
New Year’s resolutions have really lost their meaning (or perhaps they never really had meaning). They’re often too basic, and are more for sayers than doers. If this year you want to be a doer and accomplish many goals, then it’s time for you to write you own constitution.
Writing a constitution for yourself is more profound than a to-do or life list. It has to do more with the beginning and middle steps and small goals, than the end results. Goal lists are an excellent tool and have their purpose, but you only see the ending, not how to get there.
Personal constitutions are not popular yet, but Dennis McCafferty of USA Weekend mentioned that even actor Will Smith and his family wrote their own constitution, in an interview he did with Will.
So if you want to do something fresh, this article will be your guide. The structure does not follow the US Constitution exactly, so have fun with it, move things around or add more to it. And if you would like; write a constitution with your family as well.
- The Preamble (intro)
First and foremost, figure out the main reasons why you’re writing a personal constitution. Along with your name, this will be the preamble or introduction. For example:
“I, John Doe, am creating this document to establish a happier, more prosperous, and extraordinary life.”
The intro doesn’t need to be long.
Now it’s time for more details. The next ten sections of your constitution will cover various aspects of your life. The reasoning is that the problems in one area of our lives may actually be caused by a completely different aspect. A financial problem could be caused by an attitude problem.
- Section 1: Emotions & Attitude
Think about the aspects of your personality and emotions you shouldn’t change, first. If you’re caring and ambitious then you certainly don’t want to change that.
Now think of the emotions and attitudes you want to change. Perhaps it’s the way you react to certain situations. Do you freak out when things don’t go your way?
Keeping with the John Doe character as a model:
“Section 1
In order to obtain more happiness I must let situations get out of my hands. Instead of freaking out I will step back and observe from afar and piece together why the event occurred.
I will not change my ambition, my honesty, and the way I care for others. I will however, relax my ambition when it’s necessary to live in the moment.”
Think of the way you act around certain people. Reflect on how positive and negative you are and even contemplate how you let other peoples’ emotions affect yours.
- Section 2: Family
It’s usually very hard to change members of your family. They’re your toughest critics and they have to want to change.
Consider what you want for them. Or maybe you even want to start your own family. Do they need wealth, health, happiness, or a home?
“Section 2
I appreciate all that my family has done and still does for me.
I want them to have more happiness, and better wealth. I forfeit my personal gains so that I can assist them when they need me.
I will give them my ears when they need someone to talk to and I will motivate them to achieve a better life alongside me.”
If your family is not happy and prosperous, either will you.
- Section 3 – Career
This is a self-explanatory section. Do you want to change careers? Retire? Fix the career you have or try a new and crazy career?
“Section 3
I no longer want to work dead end jobs. I will find a career in which I feel fulfilled by helping others feel fulfilled.
The career I pursue will also utilize my college degree.”
- Section 4 – Finances
This is on everyone’s minds. Do you need to get out of debt? Pay off loans? Do you want to make a million dollars?
“Section 4
I will pay off the rest of my college loans in 6 months.
I will save $400 every month of the year, or if I can I will save more, with the goal of reaching $5,000 in savings.”
- Section 5 – Charity
Will you donate money, resources, or time?
“Section 5
I will donate 10% of what I earn each month to various charities.”
- Section 6 – Helping others
Charity is not the only way to help others. Every day we can do simple things that will change the lives of others. Simple acts like:
- Giving up your seat to someone standing.
- Holding the door for someone.
- Even smiling to strangers.
“Section 6
I will go out of my way to help others, even if it means I’ll be late to wherever I’m going.
I’ll sincerely compliment others when they’re having a bad day.”
- Section 7 – Fears to face
It is extremely rare for someone to make a resolution to face a fear. With a personal constitution it is mandatory.
Think of fears that are hindering your success, your happiness, or fears that are just wasting your time.
“Section 7
I will face my biggest fear of speaking in public. I will make it a regular part of my occupation once I tackle this obstacle.”
- Section 8 – Health
Instead of just writing “lose weight,” be more specific. Do you need to lose 10 or 20 pounds? Also write down how you’ll go about doing that. With a mile run every day? Better eating habits? Actually using your gym membership?
“Section 8
I do not need to lose any weight, but I will gain five pounds of muscle.
I will do this by running 2 miles a week, and by lifting weights every other day.”
- Section 9 – Knowledge
Besides improving the health of your body, you must always improve the health of your mind.
Reading lots of books from different genres, reading magazines, reading blogs, writing, watching educational shows, and by watching films.
“Section 9
I will seek out the help and advice of a mentor. The mentor does not need to be famous and rich, but must have the success and happiness I desire. I will gain knowledge by listening to what he or she has to say.
I will also read at least one book a month and read articles every day.”
- Section 10 – Enjoyment
Your goals can’t be all work and no play. Include time to spend with family, new fun experiences you’ll try, and hobbies you want to keep.
“Section 10
I will eat at new restaurants or try new foods at the restaurants I frequent.
Once during the year I will spontaneously pick a place to go and head out on a small vacation within the next few days after deciding on the location.”
Your Bill of Rights and amendments
Besides the main sections of your constitution, it’s important to create your own bill of rights and include an area where you can adjust any parts of your constitution.
You can use amendments to fix time frames, change amounts; such as how much money you want to earn or how many pounds you want to lose.
The Bill of Rights will lay out your morals, what you believe in, and even how you let other people affect you. You can write as little or as many as you would like.
“My Bill of Rights
In order to stay on my path towards success and a better life, I will follow these rights and amendments.
1. I will not listen to those who tell me a goal cannot be achieved.
2. I will stand up for what I know is right.
3. I will go against the tide, not with it.
4. I will laugh every day.
5. I will help at least one stranger every day.
Amendment I
I will not seek as much money as I can make, but I will pursue as much happiness from my career as possible.”
Now it’s time to print out your constitution, sign & date it, and put it somewhere you will see it every day.
Then comes the hard part; doing it all.
Please feel free to share any pledges or rights you included in your constitution in the comment section below. Please feel free to ask any questions you may have as well.
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It’s already November 17 and 2009 is on its way; even though there’s still about a month and two weeks left of 2008.
So what goals have you accomplished in this past year? Is your to-do list shorter or now even longer? Please share in the comment section below if you would like.
If you didn’t accomplish much then now’s the time to get ready for 2009. Here’s a few quick tips on how to do it.
Roll over your goals
Don’t give up just yet. Just cross out “2008” and write in “2009.”
Change when you want to accomplish a goal by
A lot of the times we write that we want to reach a goal in six months or by the end of the year; but we should consider decreasing the times. It creates a sense of urgency and puts a little positive pressure on you.
Look back to the past year
What have you been doing to try to accomplish your goals? Perhaps it’s not working. Remember: “If you want something you’ve never had before, you’ve got to do something you’ve never done before.” – Drina Reed
Adjust and approach your goals differently
Just like the quote says, try things you’ve never done before.
Have any other tips? Please share in the comments below.
Myth #1: I need to be well-rounded
When I was a kid, I brought home a report card from school. I got an A in every subject, except English. I hated English. It didn’t make any sense to me. I was getting a C.
How did my parents respond? Did they compliment me on my excellent work in most of my classes? Did they encourage me to focus my efforts on those areas where I was having success? No. Instead, they wanted to talk about English. What was I doing wrong? How could I do better? Was I trying hard enough?
They believed, as most parents, managers and employees do, that we need to be well-rounded. We should have knowledge and skills in a variety of different areas. It is a liability to have areas of weakness. Even though most people believe this, it isn’t true.
Fact #1: I need to freak out
Shaquille O’Neal can’t shoot free throws. He’s terrible, always has been, always will be. This isn’t his only problem. He doesn’t shoot well from anywhere outside of five feet and he doesn’t even attempt three-point shots. He doesn’t handle the ball well either. In other words, he’s got a lot of bad grades on his report card.
If it was important to be well-rounded, then we would expect that Shaquille is struggling to find success. But we’d be wrong. He has won four NBA Championships with two different teams and was the MVP for three years. During many of those seasons, other teams tried to exploit his weakness by fouling him every time he got the ball. They called it Hack-A-Shaq and it didn’t work. His teams kept on winning.
Shaquille is different than most people. He is more than seven feet tall and weighs 325 pounds. Because of his incredible size and strength, he only needs to be good at one thing, catching the ball and putting it in the basket from very close range. His good grade in this area makes his other bad grades irrelevant.
It is the same with you. You don’t need to be, and you can’t be, good at everything. Don’t try to be well-rounded. Instead, freak out. Capitalize on your unique abilities and forget about your weaknesses. They don’t matter.
What are your unique skills and characteristics?
How can you build on your strengths so that your weaknesses become irrelevant?
Myth #2: I need to fit in
We tend to do what other people are doing. We are copycats. We want to fit in. We don’t want to be different or unusual. We don’t want to stick out.
There is one big problem with this strategy; fitting in makes us invisible. It makes us disappear. If we do it well, no one can see us. We don’t get any attention.
If we fit in at work, we don’t get in trouble. We don’t get fired, but we don’t get promoted either. We don’t get interesting projects and we don’t get challenging tasks. No one knows who we are.
If our business fits in, everyone drives right by. No one stops. They don’t know we’re even there.
If they do stop, they don’t stay long and they don’t buy anything because our products or services are just like everyone else’s.
Fact #2: I need to stick out
Hardee’s had a problem. They were going out of business. They were unable to compete with McDonald’s, Wendy’s and Burger King. It seemed like there wasn’t room for four major fast food restaurants.
When the other major chains began adding healthy choices like salad, fruit and yogurt, it seemed like Hardee’s would have to do the same in order to keep up. But they never added any of these items. Instead of copying the other restaurants, they did the opposite. They created Thickburgers, huge, fatty, calorie-laden burgers that clogged arteries and gave people instant diabetes.
They didn’t try to fit in. When everyone else make their menus healthier, Hardee’s deliberately made their menu unhealthier. They tried to stick out and it worked. They are no longer on the brink of bankruptcy and they have started adding new locations, instead of closing them down.
How can you stick out?
What is everyone else doing?
How can you do the opposite?
Myth #3: I need to stop procrastinating
When I ask my students to list their weaknesses, the most popular is procrastination. In fact, in most classes, every student admits to having a problem in this area. Books, articles, seminars and blog posts on overcoming procrastination are universally popular. Unfortunately, they don’t work. People keep procrastinating. They can’t help it. Why is it such a problem? I don’t think it is.
Fact #3: I need to start procrastinating more
“Don’t put off until tomorrow what you can put off until the day after tomorrow and end up just as well.” – Mark Twain
What do you procrastinate? If you are like most people, and I’m not recommending that (see #2), then you procrastinate activities that you don’t enjoy and that you don’t do well. You wait to do them until it is absolutely necessary because you’d rather be doing something else. You’d rather be doing something that you do enjoy and that you are good at.
Procrastination is good. It is a sign that we have wandered away from our strengths, that we have strayed from those activities where we can have tremendous success. Instead of procrastinating less, we should actually procrastinate more. We should simply stop doing the activities that we usually procrastinate.
If this sounds unreasonable, read Jim Collins’ bestselling book, Good to Great. He explains that successful people and great organizations have a “stop-doing” list. They deliberately eliminate activities that they don’t do well or that don’t fit with their mission. Management guru, Peter Drucker, referred to this as “organized abandonment.” Additionally, Marcus Buckingham argues that the most important thing to know about personal success is, “if you don’t like it, stop doing it.”
What do you procrastinate?
What don’t you do well?
What don’t you like to do?
How can you begin eliminating these activities from your life and work?
Myth #4: I need more self-control
What do you want? Do you want to be more organized, lose weight, get a promotion or have a better marriage? Most self-help books have one primary suggestion on how to do this, use self-discipline to simply act differently. They argue that if we just wanted it bad enough, we’d be able to make the change. Because of this, we believe that if we just had more self-control, we’d be able to achieve our goals.
In this view, people are successful because they have self-control and others are failing because they lack self-control. I disagree.
Fact #4: I need to be more fuel efficient
“People think I’m disciplined. It’s not discipline. It’s devotion.” – Luciano Pavarotti
Here is what I think. I believe that we all have the same amount of self-control. We don’t get more or less than anyone else. Successful people do not have extra discipline, they just use what they have more wisely. Similarly, we often have difficulty because we are using our discipline in the wrong places.
What are the wrong places? Fixing weaknesses, trying to fit in and fighting procrastination are the wrong places. These activities drain our energy. They sap our self-discipline.
How can we use our energy more efficiently? Build on strengths, freak out and embrace permanent procrastination. These activities are fueled by devotion, not discipline. They rely on passion instead of pain.
Devotion is more powerful and more abundant than discipline. As the entire world begins to search for alternative fuels to power our vehicles, maybe it is time to consider an alternative fuel for powering our lives.
What drains you?
What renews your energy?
How can you improve your fuel efficiency?
Myth #5: I need to fix my weaknesses
When things go bad, when we lose our job, when someone breaks up with us, when we don’t get the promotion, we assume that something is wrong with us. We search for our flaws, the reasons for our failure, and start trying to fix them.
The reason that this doesn’t work is that there is nothing wrong with you. Yes, you read that right. There is nothing wrong with you.
Fact #5: There is nothing wrong with you
“A strength not utilized is like a sundial in the shade.” – Benjamin Franklin
How does a sundial work? What does it require? It tells time by casting a shadow on the appropriate hour. It needs to be in the sun.
What happens when you put a sundial in the shade? Does it work? No, it doesn’t work.
But is it broken? Is something wrong with it? No, it isn’t broken and nothing is wrong with it.
Then what is the problem? The problem is that the sundial is in the shade. It is in the wrong spot. The sundial doesn’t need to be fixed; it needs to be moved.
It is the same in our lives and our work. When things go bad, it is not because something is wrong with us. It is because we are in the wrong spot. The job or the relationship didn’t work out because it was the wrong fit.
Instead of fixing our weaknesses, we need to look for the right fit. We need to find situations that match our strengths, highlight our abilities, and bring out the best in us. We need to get out of the shade and into the sun.
What is your shade?
How can you find the sun?
Don’t believe the myths. There is nothing wrong with you. It’s time to start freaking out, sticking out, procrastinating more, and using less self-control.
Written by David Rendall
David Rendall is a professor, entrepreneur, speaker and author of The Four Factors of Effective Leadership. His current project is The Freak Factor: Discovering Uniqueness by Flaunting Weakness.
If you want to learn more about how to freak out, you can read his manifesto: www.changethis.com/45.02.FreakFactor.
Or visit his blog: www.daverendall.typepad.com
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